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Vitaly's Testimony
I was born in a
Soviet Union in 1972 where everybody thought that faith in God is a
sign of lack of education. Great leader of Soviet Russia once said
that religion is opium for a masses. Getting atheistic education I
never even new who God is.
First time I ever
thought about God was on my History class. Before these class I’ve
read an article in a magazine that said something about universe mind.
I didn’t do my homework that day and thought I may say something smart
instead if teacher ask me. Also I liked to show off before everybody
in a class so that day I had a plan. When teacher make little pause I
ask her out loud what is she think of universal mind? Teacher
looked at me and ask if I know what it is universal mind? Of course I
said “yes”. She said that term universal mind is the same as
word God. Then she sarcastically ask me:”-Do you believe in God?”
That moment in a class room became silence. Everybody’s eyes look at
me. I look around and said out loud: ”-yeah, I do”. Then
teacher said: ”Do you know that great Lenin wrote many books and
prove there’s no God. People who believe in Him just non educated,
dark in their mind.” Somehow I new that there’s no way to back up.
Immediately I decide challenge my teacher and everybody in a class
room also. I reply: “Well, if Lenin not agree with me then he must
have been wrong”. It was in 1988. Teacher thought that she was
prepare for everything but that blown even her mind. She said that
everybody in a class have to ignore me because of what I just said. Of
course that never happen because everybody were my friends. Since that
all teachers in a school knew me and what I said. Principal had a
meeting with all teachers talking what should they do about me. All I
want is just a little show off but I wasn’t disappointed that it was
little too much. That’s how I stood for God for a very first time in
my life without even knowing of what I was doing.
Few
days after graduation of High School friends of mine and me went out for
picnic. Sitting and watching on bonfire we were talking about life. One
friend of mine mention name of Jesus in his words. After he finish I ask
him who is Jesus? I was 19 years old that time and didn’t have a clue of
who is Jesus. Friend said that Jesus is the son of God. Then I ask him who
is God? But he said he doesn’t
know. Looking at a fallen stars I made a wish. I said:
“God if you there I want you meet with me, I want to know
you.”
Eighteen months later I went to movies with couple of friends of mind and
my old brother. Movie named “Jesus” and made from a gospel of St. Luke.
That was February of 1991. I was already 19 when I for a very first time
find out who is Jesus. Watching that movie was very unusual experience.
Every word of Jesus was like a torch in my heart. First time I realize
that there is a God and Jesus is His only Son. I start to cry and tried to
wipe away tears in a way that nobody would see that I cry. Finally on the
end of movie there was a prayer. Suddenly I heard a voice inside of my
heart. I’ve never heard that voice before but somehow I knew it’s God
speaking with me. He told me: “I want you to be my son”. I start
arguing with voice. I said: “God, please I am so young. Wait till I’ll
turn 40 or more and I’ll live for you.” Back in a 1991 only way of
living for God I knew was to become a monk. I didn’t like idea to quit
normal life, quit shaving and live in a monastery. When they repeat prayer
I said part of it inside but couldn’t really mean what I said. I was very
disappointed and just hoped that God will speak with me some more
sometimes later. That time I like party and didn’t think I could fit in
church type of life.
On
the other side I was interested in reading Bible. That was hard book for
me to read. Every time I red it I felt conviction in my heart. I knew I
don’t live right but didn’t have enough strength to change it. Few months
I straggle with that conviction and my life style.
In June of 1991 I was
laying on a beech with my best friend. He told me that he goes to Moscow
on a Christian conference. I ask if I can go with him and few days later
he got me an invitation. Conference was really weird. People sang a songs
about God and carry Bibles everywhere they go. One man came to friend of
mine and me one night and invite us at his hotel room. We thought it will
be a party and we can have some fun. What was a disappointment when we
came and didn’t see even one bottle on a table. Guy said that he want to
tell us about Jesus. We said OK.
His story somehow remind me Jesus film.
I felt the same when he spoke to us. I knew everything is true of what
he said. That was at least 3 hours conversation. When he was about
through I heard same voice in my heart again. I knew Jesus is speaking
to me. He said: “I want you to be my son”. I said: “But
Jesus, I am too young. I am not ready”. Then He said: “Today is
the day of your salvation”. I felt that I don’t have strength to
tell him no. I said : “Yeas Jesus, forgive all my sins, come into
my heart and be my Lord and Savior”. Love and peace I’ve never
felt before filled my heart. I knew Jesus did what I ask him about. He
came into my heart and I even felt it. That day was best day and most
important day of my life. |
